Monday, 4 July 2016

Top 5 British Problems



Hello Everyone,

The world has been very serious lately, Britain has been rocked by controversy as half the country seems to be fighting the other half all in the name of politics and whilst I have been watching and listening to it all and taking a great interest in where we are heading next as a nation, I sometimes feel a little bit of light relief is needed.

Being British can be funny at times, we have many customs and rituals that just become part of our daily lives and even if these don't quite apply to you, I bet you know someone who each of these five points could have been written about.



1. Casual Violence:

Being a Brit can often mean you have a bizarre taste for violence to the point that a bit of casual violence becomes comedic which could make an outsider struggle to enjoy our humour. If you don't believe me then I urge you to watch an American Sit-Com then immediately watch a British Sit-Com, stateside comedies often focus on things going wrong for laughs whereas in Britain we tend to have a good sarcastic remark or a casual kick up the backside or wayward punch to the face.
My Grandma once hit my Uncle with a frying pan for being rude... an actual pan, far from being horrified my family have enjoyed this anecdote for the past 35 years, I wasn't even born but I'm expected to remember this glorious moment in time.

Ah, remember that time Grandma hit your Uncle with a Frying pan?
Good Times.

2. Cups of Tea

Is there nothing a good cuppa can't solve? No matter what catastrophe life has propelled into your day, there's a good cup of Twinings waiting to help you through.
There's also 'those' people who you considered friends till you turn up at their house with a broken heart and they offer you a cup of tea and bring you a chamomile...

What the eff is this Shelly, did you not hear I've been dumped?! 

Tea really can solve most problems I think, at least for five minutes.

Dave: SHUT THE WINDOWS BARBARA THE ZOMBIE
APOCALYPSE IS HERE!!!
THEY'RE DOWN THE ROAD, OH SWEET JESUS THEY'RE EATING
JIM AND MARY!!!!

Barbara: Ok love, I'll pop the kettle on before they get here.

3. Weather:

We brits are obsessed with weather, this is probably because we barely see any other weather than rain. I live in Scotland and I've probably seen the sun twice in my life - No really.
Anyway, people seem to think that a sunny day means any terrible event will be rectified by some sun rays because "it's a lovely day for it". The amount of times I've heard this said to someone in crisis is unreal.

Mavis: Oh hello Billy love, how you keeping?

Billy: Well Mavis, not so good, my Aunt was eaten by a pack of 
stray dogs today then my car was stolen so I couldn't
go help the family, whilst I was searching for the car
I was late for work and my boss fired me because
I'm still on my 3 months probation so I had to
walk back for the bus and a seagull shat on my head.

Mavis: Oh Billy love that's really terrible, still, least 
it's a lovely day for it isn't it.

Failing sunshine she would have offered Billy a cuppa.

4. We Love Bad Luck:

If something fantastic happens to us we generally won't tell anyone because we don't want to appear like we are showing off, this often means we have to downplay our good fortune in order to fit into social norms but if something bad occurs we can tell everyone and expect a sympathetic ear, a counteracting tale of equal woe, and, if you're really lucky, you might get a chocolate digestive out of it.

Sally: I'm so depressed, I dropped my iphone into the loo today.

Rita: I did that last week, I even flushed!

Paul: I did it too but when I flushed it actually went down, £600 
plumber bill that was.

Kevin: Well I just came into some money so I'm feeling pretty chipper.

All: ..... Tosser.

5. Perpetual Politeness:

That weird and overwhelming urge to not cause offense is the fuel that keeps many British people going, no matter what goes down, one must remain dignified and pleasant at all times even when you're internally on fire with rage and displeasure.

Meredith at the hair salon: I'd just like a quick trim and maybe a fringe put in?

Hair Stylist: Of course no problem

******Some Time Later******

Hair Stylist: There, finished. What do you think?

****Meredith's long blonde hair is now pink, there's bald patches and scalp burns.****

Meredith: Thank you, it's great

Hair Stylist: It took a bit longer and I had to use more product than I originally
planned so it'll be £450 at the till.

Meredith: Thank you so much, bye bye.

Meredith pays and leaves a tip.

We just can't complain like other nationalities, it almost seems rude to complain even if you've been seriously duped.
Personal anecdote again, when I was in labour and waiting to be moved into the delivery ward I was sat in a chair in agony... a woman came and accidentally sat on me, yes she sat ON me, did I say anything? No, I sat there contracting till the woman realised her mistake and moved on, one mustn't complain now.

There we go, I hope you can relate to some or all of these points, what do you think are British problems?

Rosy xx
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32 comments

  1. I've got a problem with being too polite, even when I'm not in the wrong I'm always the one to say sorry, I need to be more tough!

    Lauren Ashleigh xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I always say sorry too haha

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  2. Love this, you should watch Very British Problems - it's basically hundreds of issues we Brits share!

    corrie | corriearnold.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooh I didn't know this existed I'll have to look it up.

      Rosy | Sparkles of Light Blog

      Delete
  3. You are so spot on all the points , the tea is a worldwide know thing and i have noticed the one of having bad luck too . But all in all its what makes you different from the rest of the world. Great post.

    www.stylenbeautylounge.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha I'm glad you enjoyed reading this :)

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  4. Haha this is such a great post. It's so nice to see something light hearted about our country at the moment xo

    https://57-days.blogspot.co.uk/2016/07/4-goals-for-next-3-months.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's been pretty gloomy lately hasn't it.

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. Yey, I'm glad you agree :)

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  6. Haha, this reminds me of the Very British Problems book, we are SO unique in our eternal politeness, and you're definitely right about the tea and weather obsessions!

    Lucy x- Yellowicing

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are a strange nation haha

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  7. Lovely post. x

    www.themakeupaficionado.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. oh I do love a good cuppa :D

    Gemma x
    www.jacquardflower.uk

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ha,ha absolutely loved these and can totally relate to 1. and 2.!! Tea definitely cures many things, love it <3


    Jenny | Krystel Couture + Giveaway

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ha ha, this is hilarious, and so true!
    As a norwegian I can relate to a few of them actually :P

    xo Karla | www.misskarla.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooh I didn't know Norway shared our problems too :)

      Rosy xx

      Delete

  11. "I'll pop the kettle on" has got to be the most British phrase that could ever, and has ever, lived. We brits really do love a good cuppa don't we?! I can't for the life of me comprehend how countries manage without it!

    And sweet lord, number five made me laugh. It is SO true. We just cannot apologise about things enough can we?!

    Really great post.

    Katie xx ♥ La Coco Noire

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Life wouldn't be the same without Tea, I couldn't get by in life!

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  12. Haha, this post is so true! I have to stop saying 'sorry' so much!!
    Have a lovely day :)
    Rosanna x
    Rose's Rooftop

    ReplyDelete
  13. Love this so much!! Haha! Im guilty of it all. One of my faves is using positive words for negative sentences.

    Phil 'Sorry Larry, Bob. Toms just had the last biscuit.'
    Larry ' FANTASTIC!'
    Bob 'GREAT TOM, JUST REALLY GREAT'

    Our ways do amuse me sometimes lol. kate xx

    themakeupartistschoice.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm always laughing at various Britishisms but I just can't stop myself doing them!

      Rosy xx

      Delete
  14. I'd never thought about the casual violence on British tv thing but it's so true, one of my all time favourite shows is Bottom and there's so much of it in that haha x
    www.beautiful-solutions.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
  15. So so funny and so bloody true as well. I am so overly polite, a guy pushed me out of the way to get on the tube and I apologised to him 🙈 We do love bad luck as well don't we, this has honestly cracked me up!

    Elle
    www.theellenextdoor.com
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm always saying sorry, I just can't stop myself :)

      Rosy | Sparkles of Light Blog

      Delete
  16. Hahah what a great post! and so so true :) Completely agree about the politeness too, we're far too worried about offending others even when they are there to make us feel great e.g. hair dressers! x

    Liv | Ramblings of a Makeup Lover

    ReplyDelete
  17. Haha this is brilliant and so relatable! I recently stayed with my parents following an operation and I've never had to drink so much tea in my life! Also, the hairdresser thing is something I've done on numerous occasions, if I do hate what they've done I still say I love it, pay and then go home and cry haha.

    Em, ohfab.co.uk

    ReplyDelete

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